walking on a tightrope

I met with my employer yesterday over Zoom, and it didn't go well.

Not only did they change my entire job description/duties, but they also stated that I would need to return to the office.

Well, I was never in the office. I was hired as a permanent remote employee, so this took me off guard. I realize companies are strong-arming people to return to the office post-Covid, but: why? Is it control? Are they paying astronomical rent for a building location, therefore, they need people to occupy said building? I genuinely don't understand this. Wtf!

Regardless, I told them that this new policy (which became apparent the DAY of my first day back) affects my back-to-work plan laid out by my surgeon and chiropractor and that I would be in touch as to when I could safely return to the office. Why wasn't I told about this new policy back in October?

It would take me an hour and a half in transit to get there and back—three hours of travel time a day. My leg wouldn't be able to sustain this five days a week and would no doubt regress my recovery.


I'm stressed.

Everything feels so precarious. Up in the air. I'm on a tightrope.

Did my loathing of returning to this job hurl the Universe to move and conspire this outcome?

I keep vacillating between things will be ok just find another job ASAP to my life is slipping into a stellar-mass black hole, and I'm going to be spaghettified into oblivion.