The perfect reflection of my addiction

I’m reading blogs on my phone. My posture is bad, scrunched up in the corner of the couch. Sipping my first coffee of the day. The curtains are drawn, and the light shines through its gauzy fabric.

Habits—the metaphorical gum in our hair.

My grocery receipts: identical, with only slight deviances. I wear the same black jeans/leggings, a tee, and my holed-up chucks.

The people I gravitate towards, the people I date, the places and situations I feel most comfortable; a familiar tapestry.

Emotionally unavailable men/women: the perfect reflection of my addiction.

A familiar loop of sameness with little disparity.

Wanting change within ourselves, our thought processes, life circumstances, yet doing nothing differently. [Insert Einstein's quote here].

I’d like to choose better; allow the good ones in. Yet the subconscious is robust, unable to differentiate between what’s safe vs what is best for us.