Soon We’ll Be Dead: T Van Santāna

Welcome to another issue of Soon We'll Be Dead.

This series has been an interesting thing to work on lately.

As I'm caring for a terminally ill father and another close friend, my initial inclination is to want to hide under the covers and bury myself in shows/movies. But there's value in confronting these questions.

On the other hand, focusing on The End ad nauseam robs us of our now. It's a fine balance I'm still working through.

Does reading these answers alleviate my fears? Do they comfort me? Do they comfort you? I'm not sure. It's an experiment I'm still considering.



T Van Santāna

Do you have a website, blog, or socials?

Ello, Substack

Are you scared of death?


What do you think happens to us when we die? Where do we go?

Everything is transformed into another state of being, but nothing really 'goes' anywhere, per se.

Do you have a sense of purpose in life? What were you put on this Earth to do?

Broadly, to be helpful.

What makes a meaningful life?

Wisdom, kindness, gratitude, some sense of continuity. Friends!

If you were going to die today, what would you regret the most?

Not having finished

How do you want to be remembered?

I dunno. Something like cool or nice I guess.

Is it important to you to leave a legacy behind?

I guess so, yeah.

What are you most proud of in your life?

My kids, I guess. My work, kind of.

Would you rather be cremated or buried? Why?

Cremated. Like a hundo. I have no desire to be mummified. But whatever my family wants is fine.

What do you want your epitaph to say?

A writer who was unsure what to write for their epitaph? I dunno yet. Maybe someone else will write something for a change.

What would be the worst/best way to die for you?

Worst: anything skin related. Best: during meditation.

What are your five "Bucket List" (for lack of a better term) things you want to do before you die? What are some important things that you want to experience, learn, or do?

Oh, jeez, let’s see: 5) live in Paris, 4) ... there have to be four more, right? I dunno. Don't really have a bucket list anymore. But I'll think about it and let you know if I come up with anything.

#soon we’ll be dead