creative flux
When I stopped writing my Pencilbooth newsletter in January, I immediately felt a sense of relief, which was quickly followed by feelings of loss and regret.
I loved writing those letters.
In a small way, it gave me a sense of creative purpose. Gathering my thoughts every week, compiling little links, sharing my art, and whatever else I was musing over that week.
The fact that some people were paying me for those letters felt simultaneously terrifying (am I providing enough?) and a complete dream. It felt like I was finally working towards something I've always wanted. And I still do, I just don't know in what capacity.
There are parts of me that loves the anonymity of writing on Bear. Not knowing who reads me is a very peaceful notion. Anyone who likes my blog can subscribe via RSS, and if they choose to unfollow, I don't see it, which is a relief to my oversensitive nature.
But there's also a part of me that doesn't want to give up on my dreams of making money with my blog on whatever platform, even if it is on Substack.
Idk, I feel like I'm in a deep creative flux.
Right now, I'm enjoying making art in my sketchbook with no purpose but to play, space out, and take a break from the realities of life.
I went to wonderpens yesterday and got a few washi tapes <3
been studying the major arcana and using it for some journaling
Wonderpens has this Letter Writing Club on March 14th, and a part of me really wants to go. It would be nice to hang out with other stationary nerdlings for an hour or so. Grab a seat, write your love letters, political protests, or daydreams. Cute!
Weekly report:
- Listening to Courtney Barnett.
- Process > results.
- The creative yellow light: should i stop or keep going?
- Subscribed to Evtso's Patreon bc her art and zines nourish my inner kid.
- I don't want to think about writing platforms anymore (bonne chance ma chère!).
- Taking a break from selling art. I closed my shop for a while.
- Reading: The Life Impossible by Matt Haig.
heart-ons
Loving Jet Williams blog and his hitchhiking adventures. Makes me wish I had filmed my hitchhiking days!
Rikkianne Van Kirk's art on found paper is so gorgeous.
I'm not usually a lover of maximalist websites, but Oopsie Doodle has dragged me to the dark side.
I read Jen Bianca's most recent letter, and her thoughts on living a less-documented life really resonated with me.