2 am

I couldn’t sleep last night. I was up until 2am? listening to music, which turned into me making a “mix tap” for a friend, which was fun until my eyes felt like they were going to bleed. I eventually put a podcast on and dozed off.

I tapped my phone quickly around 5:30am to check the time and noticed I had missed over 20 messages and dozens of calls.

Pops passed away around 2-2:30 am. I had my phone on silent from when I was at the hospital, so I missed everyone trying to reach me.

I don’t think it’s hit me quite yet. I feel like I’ve been grieving, crying, and heartbroken for days leading up to today, that now I feel run dry.

The service is this Friday, and I’ve been tasked with compiling a music list. My dad and I have bonded over music our whole lives, so it’s only fitting that I’d put it together. It will help me focus on something over the next few days, I guess.

I’ve taken the week off work. My apartment is a disaster, so perhaps I’ll start with that. Stocking the fridge is the next priority, as it’s been empty since last week. Been eating out too much, back and forth from the hospital, without much of a schedule. My diet has been horrible. Need fresh fruit and something healthy.

I feel high from lack of sleep. Maybe a small nap wouldn’t be the worst thing.